Say What? Faith?

I tend to rush into things, this translates to: ‘I haven’t developed the necessary skills to take good and effective decisions in my life’. I have known it all along. From what flavor of pizza I want to order, to what career path I was to follow, it has all been like walking around a tempting swimming pool, wanting to dive in, but not knowing the perfect moment, how to do it, or if the water will be warm enough.

Chapter Two, of Lysa Terkeurst’s book, ‘What Happens When Women Say Yes to God’, embarked me on a journey that traced back the origins of my inability to make wise decisions, and guess what I discovered: I hardly ever took my own decisions! other well intentioned people had been doing it for me all along. They didn’t want me to feel hurt, or pain, or make a choice that may be, I would regret all my life. They wanted my life to be characterized by right decisions, but it is not wise to dive into a pool, when all you have taken is ‘swimming theory I’. And when my adulthood years began, I felt I was diving into the sea, it was so overwhelming without God as my guide.

Image

So throughout my life, God had hardly been invited to my ‘decision making parties’, how could the results turn out right? How could He be present in those moments, if I didn’t share time with Him? How could I have known if the decision I was about to take was consistent with His character, if I hardly knew Him at all? How could I have known if I was headed in the right path, if I was looking to please every one but Him?

And then, right there, with the beautiful colors of sunset in the background, as I was watching and capturing the moment this islander boy was about to dive fearlessly in to the sea, He spoke to my heart… ‘Be a woman of Faith!!’ F a i t h … I thought about that powerful force that lacks all sorts of logic, and what it meant for me, that it was, precisely, that sensible fiber of my heart, the one God chose to transform. Faith, Me?! Me, a person who could hardly enjoy a kid’s swimming pool, who had to ask for earthly advise every time I was going to make a choice, a person who would move the pilot out of the way, if she only knew how to fly the plane? He wanted me to be a woman of faith!

I felt He was whispering to my heart … ‘Just close your eyes now, and jump into life, make your own choices, make some mistakes as well, but always believe I am with you all the way, even if you do not see me, I will make sure you feel my loving presence in your life. Remember, perfect love drives out fear’, and His love is perfection.

Image

I realized that up until now, it was not me who had made a few right choices. It was not because of my ‘intelligence’, that some aspects of my life, thank God, have turned out great and I cherish so much. It is out of His enormous mercy and love, that as I am writing this, i feel  like a child who has been secretly let to win a game, so he feels like a real champion.

Image

Yes Lord, I choose to be a woman of obedience and faith, I chose to look for You, like a lost ship looks for dry land. I choose to carefully listen to You in our quiet moments, and not ‘lean on my own understanding’.  I choose not to lie to myself, believing I am in control, knowing that it is You who lovingly wait for me, down in the water when I take the plunge. I will dive into circumstances with confidence, because You are my guide and my strength. Thank you Lord, because making decisions, wishing only to please you, gives me peace and courage. Thank you God, because Your perfect love drives out the fears that, sometimes threaten my precious walk with You. I give you thanks and praises Lord. Amen.

“You will seek me and you will find me when you seek me with all your heart.”

Jeremiah 29:13 NIV

*Photographs taken in San Andres Island, Colombia.

Advertisements

Learning To Live For Him

Taking a Journey with Jesus...Learning To Be More Like Him Daily

nancymiksad

This WordPress.com site is the cat’s pajamas

Living With Eyz2God

One Day at a Time...

The Neighborhood

telling the story from every vantage point

His Power Made Perfect

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. ~2 Cor 12:9